The Good and Why That's Bad

In trying to understand myself, it would be favorable to look at some of my least desirable or objectionable traits or habits as it stems from a past event or time. Although conversely I should look at how bad times and good times have affected me today. Good times may have affected me positively or negatively.
I look back at middle school only with fondness. It was a time of high achievement in my life and the last time that happened.
I use to procrastinated in middle school where I stayed up late finishing work. It was great because it always worked out. That is not the case now and I need to acknowledge it and work on immediate task completion and incremental studying.
I have always found comfort and distraction in TV and movies. I think that it will actually lead to greater understanding of myself or some inspiration yet it never does. I watch the same things over and over again. There might be some comfort in repetition and some hypnosis in the familiar.
So the question is how have the good times and the bad times affected me.
The bad times, like college, have made me fear the pain. I don't open emails or test for fear of seeing the grade.
The good times have made me open to procrastination. They play on each other.
When I think about who I want to be it is a person who is deliberate, well-planned, focused person the bad times deters me from believing something is possible or pain-less and the good times makes me think it is okay to procrastinate and their is happiness or value in that.